Back to Work

What am I doing 4AM in the morning? I'm back at work. I'm doing US outsource projects again. It's been almost 2 years (Nov '05) since I left the company where I worked. Now I'm back. Why? Well, many things. I have been struggling and praying for a go these past few weeks if I revive my flash artist profession. Ministry has been very fruitful and the need is huge. But I gotta take care of some things especially my family. My funds are running out and I'm lagging with my contributions in the house bills. Something that really convinced me to return was just this week, my mom, dad and I went to the hospital to get checked up. I had recurring flu which was getting worse everyday. My dad had this lump on his back that after diagnosis, the doctor declared it was an early stage of tumor. Now the doctor reassured us that it is not a serious thing, as long as it's removed ASAP before it becomes infected, but hearing those words really shook me up. I mean that was my dad. Anyway, he's going under operation today for the lump to be removed. Praying that everything's gonna be okay. But you get the picture. I need to work for my family.

Also this week, two of my friends back in college got engaged. Ganito pala kapag mid-20s na. You hear friends getting married one after another. And of course, I also have my own wedding to attend to ... in the near future, hehe. But yeah, I need to prepare for that.

So far so good.

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PSALM 121

I lift up my eyes to the hills—
where does my help come from?
My help comes from the LORD,
the Maker of heaven and earth.

He will not let your foot slip—
he who watches over you will not slumber;
indeed, he who watches over Israel
will neither slumber nor sleep.

The LORD watches over you—
the LORD is your shade at your right hand;
the sun will not harm you by day,
nor the moon by night.

The LORD will keep you from all harm—
he will watch over your life;
the LORD will watch over your coming and going
both now and forevermore.

Color of the Day

Last Tuesday night I and Netty went out to dinner. I got out off class quite early so I got time to get a haircut. And when it was time to pick her up at the clinic, we were wearing the same color of shirt. Now, blue, black or something dark would be fine. It was not the first time we find ourselves wearing the same color of clothes on a date, we find ourselves wearing yellow one time. This time I was wearing baby pink and she was wearing brighter shade of pink! I know some people would perceive this as something cute. And I know a couple who took it as a 'sign' that they were meant for each other. It was funny and awkward at the same time when we got to the mall 'cause you would feel everyone's looking at you. I could imagine people thinking, "Of all the colors they would agree on wearing, pink pa." But nevertheless, after a while the consciousness wears off and we had a great time. We had Thai dinner and a regular stop at DQ. It was all good.

There are days when most people that you would meet and come across with are wearing the same color of shirt. It was like that yesterday. I took the train to Recto and there were a handful of people wearing the same color as mine--yellow!

Passenger Seat

It has been a busy but fruitful week last week. Yesterday we had a district student ministry rally in ICS. Spoke on one session about starting a campus cellgroup. I thought it went well. There was so much pressure and tension that day I was drained to the last drop. That's when again I praised God for having Netty by my side. I was so glad that she was with me ever supportive throughout the day. After finally we were able to spend time by ourselves, we dined on a simple noodle house in Makati Avenue. Driving her home I was so blessed by her presence. Even though my body was exhausted, my heart is rejoicing. Her thoughtfulness and concern for me is something a person like me doesn't really deserve. But still I thank God, ever in wonder by His loving kindness, for bringing her into my life. Life since has been more gracious—going through life's adventures with someone to share and experience it with—better than without someone to love you and to love in return. Something that not all God's creatures truly ever find.

Beautiful ...

Woke up this morning and a hostage drama is on TV. Some guy, who would soon be known as Jun Ducat, made hostage of 32 pre-school children with their teachers. The news was even on cable news channels. I left home with not knowing if the hostage drama was resolved. But as it turns out, the hostage taker surrendered, after negotiations from political celebrities and the children were safe. This guy ought to be in jail. I think he’s mad. Putting helpless children in danger for motives however of good intent is unjust. He was like a child who threw tantrums because he didn’t get what he wanted – a government free of corruption. I mean we all want that. But this isn’t the way to do it, fighting evil with evil. I was even more irked watching an interview of a grandmother of a released child sympathizing with the hostage taker and justifying his actions. That makes me think, what kind of a society do we have? Could that be the general mindset of the masang Filipino (masses)? I feel that people are frustrated and losing hope and there's no other resolve but to give in, diluting our judgments. I hope not. I think we ought to stop blaming other people for our conditions because we in some ways have dipped in to make it so. Do your duty and let others follow. And even if nobody else follows, God upholds the righteous and never lets his work go down the drain.

I’ve been reading Paulo Coelho’s “Like the Flowing River” and it keeps on speaking to me. A writer does have a way with words that are sometimes hard to express and concretize. His views are Christian-like and it makes me think that he could be a believer or a really good enlightened Catholic. He’s been speaking to me about solitude; that sometimes I need to just stop and smell the roses. Reflect on the day that has past. What good have I done? What have contributed today in the fulfillment of my “personal legend”? It is true when he wrote that often we equate our importance and value by our busyness. And we view solitude as uselessness to the world. But it is when we are in solitude that we see who we really are and listen to that still small voice that affirms that we are loved and cared for. I think I am going to be influenced by Coelho’s philosophy of life.

I hope that I could be like him in the aspect of traveling, less than halfway through the book he has accounted for staying and traveling to various places on the planet. And the better thing is that while he does it he sees the meaning of life.

Technology has become one of soul’s worst enemies. Television and the Internet has placed us in a receiving mode robbing us of time to contemplate and give out.

In lieu of recent events I think being a negotiator is a really cool job. I like the thought of dismantling tragedy by untangling a distorted person’s emotion and mind. It is now one of my dream jobs or jobs-in-a-parallel-universe along with being a scientist/researcher in field such as archeologists or biologists and being a flight attendant (just ask me why when we meet). Nonetheless, being a youth pastor, designer and student is a really cool job.



Today I did multimedia for our school’s graduation. It’s always great when people’s goals become a reality. It’s sad though because most of my classmates during my first semester in ASCM of which became some of my friends in school has graduated and will be going back to their country and ministry. Two finished their doctorates. I still haven’t got the motivation to pursue doctorate studies. I must look back on my calling God has given me. I still have a long way to go. I have already completed 45 of the 96 required units to complete. I am afraid to ask why am I doing this for fear that I may get a confused answer. Am I still doing it for God or for men? Coelho writes about the danger of missing the value of what we are doing because we when we focus too much on the rules, we start not to enjoy the task that we are doing. Indeed my existence in bible school has equipped and molded me to become the person I am today. I hope that when I reach the end of this race my goal will still be the same and more refined since the day I entered it.



Tonight Netty and I celebrated our 3rd monthsary. It’s as if it’s been a long time. Tonight she really looked lovely, though I forgot to tell her that. Sometimes she catches me just studying her profile. We had a delightful pasta dinner and dessert at DQ which has become a habit of ours every time we go to G4 or Gateway. She gave me a gift – an electric toothbrush – which recently I told her that I wanted one but not because I was hinting for a monthsary gift. I gave her a Patrick Star stuffed toy so that she will be reminded of me minus the dumbness of Patrick Star. Third month, the initial romance level is being normalized. She tease me as unromantic and un-gentleman which I am not – totally. But with our feet returning to the ground I have realized that our commitment for each other is revealed. And with that I am really, really happy and content. Pray that our commitment for each other will be as hard as diamond.

Pray for me:

• I’m traveling on April 2-3 to Pila, Laguna for a ministry meeting. I might be driving. Please pray for safety on the road.
• I’ll be speaking in two camps on April 24-25 in Olongapo and May 3 in Taytay. Please pray that God will use me as His mouthpiece and touch the heart and soul of the ears that will hear me speak. Lord empty me so that You’ll flow thru me.
• Pray for my financial provisions. Indeed God is always faithful and I continue to learn to trust Him in this aspect.

She's the one...

Her name is Antonette, Nette for short (she doesn't want to be called Tonette, because it's too gay daw). She's a dentist. She's a youth leader in ICS and a volunteer for Philippine Health Care Ministries as volunteer dentist to various missions local and soon abroad. A woman with a passion for God and the lost. I haven't told her yet, but I'm very proud of her, and I'm grateful to God that He gave me someone as thoughtful and committed to God as her. I'm not into flowery eloquences now, but these thing I know:

• I always want to make her smile and laugh, even at the expense of myself, which I don't normally do.
  
• It's more than 'co-incidence' that our ways have met. Everything fell into place at the right place and the right time.
  
• When we talk, there's no awkward moment even in silence knowing that she is just there and I'm just here.
• I miss her when we're not together. Even when we just met the day before. It seems like days.
• She met my parents, I met hers. And we received blessings from both families.
  
• I have peace in my heart.
  
• I love her already, but the more I spend time and know her that love continues to flourish and grow...
  

I asked her and she said 'yes' on December 28, Thursday, between 10-11PM at Baywalk.

Finally I've found the one whom I'd spend my life with.

Please do pray for us.