Psalm 45:10-12 (NASB)

Listen, O daughter, give attention and incline your ear:
Forget your people and your father's house;
Then the King will desire your beauty.
Because He is your Lord, bow down to Him.
The daughter of Tyre will come with a gift;
The rich among the people will seek your favor.

1. As a son of God, I must listen and take heed to the Words of the Father.
2. I must put off my identity for His identity; I should put Him above all relationships. ("He who doesn't hate his father or mother is not worthy of Me" - Jesus)
   
3. It is only then that I will be seen righteous in His sight.
4. He deserves our worship and submission.
5. The world shall take note of you.
6. And they will seek your help and favor for He is with you.

Lord, may I listen and take heed to your Word always. Help me forget the sinful and imperfect identity even though sometimes I put it on again and left guilty. Let my first priority be only You, in words and in deed. I thank You that through Your Son, I am made beautiful in Your sight. Therefore I will worship You forever because of Your great and mighty Name. And the world will see that You are Lord, You are Lord!

There had been no classes for two days now. Even though the storm is out, winds and rain frequently POUR down like theres no tomorrow. I've been wanting to go to office today to pick up some funds, but the rain is delaying it. My dad took the car to work, so I have to go there and pick it up, then go back so we could go home together. And as if my mood parallels this weather, I'm feeling really idle right now.. Well, what's new about that? For the past weeks I was lagging on God-time - big time. Ministry works doesn't help. It's like being busy but being empty inside. I think I've reached its toll when last Sunday I preached and I felt so bad inside. Hard to explain. It's one of THOSE days again.

For sometime now I've been thinking of getting some source of "bread." Bills and financial responsibilities on the horizon doesn't help either. It's that feeling again of helplessness, but I think that's the time I get to seriously no qualms depend on God. Independence is an annoying trait of cholerics - "if possible do not rely on anyone, they will just fail your expectations." But I know that He is not like that. I believe sometimes we humans perceive God like He needs to fit to our qualificatioins. He has proven Himself before, why not now? The question is: have I proven myself to Him? That question for me needs a lot of thinking. The answer is instant but the question that lingers is why?

Today, I'm trying to pick up myself. I've been catching up on God-time. But that sense of "I have to make it up to Him" rears it head, as if that itself would erase all the doodles on paper. What does God want? I believe it's our acknowledgement of our nothingness. But sometimes I so want to make it up to Him, so that I could subconsciously "take credit" for yet another personal victory over the flesh. But such things are crap. God just wants me to give it up trying to make righteous by myself which is far from becoming a reality by my own means. But thanks be to God for His Son Jesus Christ! So that I will be seen as a holy God sees me, but so that I will be seen in the light of Jesus Christ His Son. In Him is my confidence. He is my sure foundation. The Light of my life. I am made righteous because of Him. I am NOTHING without Christ.

I admire this person I know who always look at the silver lining of every dark cloud. I think her motto about other people is "there's always something good to appreciate about other people - no matter how unbelievable that person is." Well, she bears with me, that's something :) I'm also trying that now but success often seems to elude me.

If someone is reading this, do remember me in your prayers. Everyone's in the journey.

Lately I have become an official bum. Few weeks ago I've stopped going to the office where I used to work. Its effect are getting its toll. I was telling a friend of mine how it has blurred my sense of time and urgency. I have so much free time that I take time easy. I feel idle. To counter that, last week I started a bible study group in Metro Nursing College. We meet twice a week, one in campus, the other for discipleship. Today we had discipleship at church. It was great. Later in the afternoon had class in Hebrew. Attended a funeral service of a church family member in the evening.

Even blogging has been tasking.

Lapit na birthday ko...

Your Birthdate: September 11
Spiritual and thoughtful, you tend to take a step back from the world. You're very sensitive to what's going on around you, yet you remain calm. Although you are brilliant, it may take you a while to find your niche. Your creativity is supreme, but it sometimes makes it hard for you to get things done.

What Does Your Birth Date Mean?

"They (the Samurai) are an intriguing people. From the moment they wake up they devote themselves to the perfection of whatever they pursue. I have never seen such discipline."

"There is so much here I will never understand. I've never been a church-going man, and what I've seen on the field of battle has led me to question God's purpose. But there is indeed something spiritual in this place. And though it may forever be obscure to me, I cannot but be aware of its power."

- Captain Nathan Algren, "The Last Samurai"

"They should name a gender after you. Looking at you doesn't do it. Staring is the only way that makes any sense. And trying not to blink, so you don't miss anything. And all of that, and you're you... It's just you are drop dead, crazy gorgeous! So much so that I'm actually considering looking at you again before we finish up here."

- John Clasky, "Spanglish"

It's a rainy day today. Slept at 3AM this morning working on some posters for our upcoming Youth Worship night, got a little carried away. I was supposed to have a 9AM class today. Woke up 8AM to the sound of rushing wind, literally. Storm was so bad. I hesitated to go to school, knowing streets would be flooded then. But still I felt so bummed out because I wanna go to school but for sure I'm gonna be late, miss the morning quiz and be left embarrassed. Listening to AM radio, they suspended classes only after the students have gone to school, as usual.



I installed this free software called Google Earth where you can view satellite images of locations anywhere in the world. I could put in markers and label locations. I could even view my house from there, so does everyone's house from our youth. Somehow that gives me the creeps... they are watching us. Try also checking out Google Maps.

Hatikva

As long as in the heart, within
A Jewish soul still yearns
And onward toward the East
An eye still watches toward Zion

Our hope has not yet been lost
The two thousand year old hope
To be a free nation in our own homeland
The land of Zion and Jerusalem

Yesterday me and my folks went to Mall of Asia to see Superman. Superman is OK. Pros first. I liked the planecrash scene early in the movie where we get the first glimpse of Superman saving the world again. Casting is also good (Except for Lex Luthor, Kevin Spacey's face is too nice). I'm divided in raving for this movie, because one I don't wanna be a pooper since everyone's raving on it. But the other side of me (talk about alter-ego, ahem) is not so bought-in to the movie. Spider-Man 2 (and Batman Begins) far better achieves the exploration of human emotion, which I believe has got its kick from Spider-Man 1 in building its character foundation. So I guess we'll have to wait for Superman 2. Like I wrote earlier, I was really caught into the planecrash scene (a catastrophe of magnitude proportions!!) but then the camera zooms too soon into the characters. By the end of the movie, I thought that the ability of Superman was unbelievable because he can win everything, except against Kryptonite. (Similar to Mano-o-Mano bout where all the Filipino boxers and Pacquiao won, where's the excitement in that?) Superheroes must have some human weakness and vulnerability, though technically he is not human. But who cares. Guess what's my phone's wallpaper and ringtone, hehe. Also, the movie (and Superman) is so allegorical of Jesus in a sense that they both came to be the "savior" of the world.